The Power Behind One Connection

One of the biggest mistakes people make in networking isn’t saying the wrong thing.

It’s deciding — too quickly — who is worth their time.

We scan the room, read job titles, listen for keywords, and subconsciously rank people as “relevant” or “not relevant” before a real conversation has even started.

And that single habit quietly costs people some of their greatest opportunities.

 

Why We Judge Connections Too Fast

Most misjudgement in networking comes from a very human place: fear.

Fear of:

• Wasting time
• Talking to the “wrong” person
• Missing the one perfect connection
• Being inefficient or unstrategic

So we convince ourselves that networking should be targeted — that only certain people deserve our attention.

But here’s the flaw in that thinking:

You’re not just meeting one person.

You’re meeting their entire network.

And that network is invisible at first glance.

 

What Connection Really Means

True connection in networking isn’t about titles or ownership.

It’s about:

• Influence
• Trust
• Access
• Relationships built over time

Some of the most powerful connectors you’ll ever meet:

• Don’t own the business
• Aren’t decision-makers on paper
• Aren’t your “ideal client”

But they know your ideal clients.
They talk to them.
They’re trusted by them.

And when that trust transfers — opportunities multiply.

 

A Real-World Example: One Conversation, Five Referrals

I once witnessed this firsthand in a networking group.

A new member joined and was quietly overlooked by others.

Why?

Because she wasn’t the business owner.

People assumed — incorrectly — that she wasn’t a valuable connection.

I chose to connect anyway.

Instead of judging her role, I asked questions. I listened. I stayed curious.

What I discovered was this:

She was exceptionally well connected.
She had strong relationships across multiple industries.
And she was trusted.

In just one follow-up meeting, that single connection led to five referrals.

Five.

Not because I targeted her.
Not because she fit a predefined box.
But because I treated the conversation as an opportunity to understand, not evaluate.

That experience reinforced something I’ve seen repeatedly over the years:

Behind one genuine connection, there can be dozens of opportunities you can’t see yet.

 

The Hidden Cost of “Targeted Networking”

When networking becomes too transactional, something important is lost.

You stop being present.
You stop listening.
You stop building trust.

And ironically, the more “efficient” people try to be, the fewer meaningful outcomes they create.

Because networking doesn’t work like a checklist.

It works like a ripple effect.

 

An Analogy That Explains It Perfectly

Think of networking like planting seeds.

If you only water the plants you expect to grow fruit immediately, you miss the fact that some seeds:

• Take longer
• Grow underground first
• Support the soil for everything else

You don’t always know which seed will produce the strongest result — but you do know that nothing grows where no care is given.

Conversations work the same way.

 

Reframing the Question

Instead of asking:

• “Is this person my target?”
• “Is this worth my time?”
• “Can this lead somewhere?”

Try asking:

• “What can I learn here?”
• “Who might this person be connected to?”
• “How can I add value to this conversation?”

This subtle shift changes everything.

It turns networking from:

• Selective → intentional
• Transactional → relational
• Short-term → strategic

And that’s when conversations begin turning into collaborations, opportunities and clients.

 

The Truth About Valuable Connections

You don’t always recognise value in the moment.

Value often reveals itself later — through:

• Referrals
• Introductions
• Shared rooms
• Unexpected collaborations

Which is why the most effective networkers don’t rush conversations.

They stay open.
They stay curious.
They stay human.

Because networking isn’t about predicting outcomes.

It’s about creating the conditions where outcomes can emerge.

 

Final Thought

The next time you’re networking — online or in person — pause before you decide whether someone is “worth it”.

Behind just one connection, there may be:

• A future collaborator
• A trusted referral partner
• Or a door you didn’t even know existed

And the only way to discover that…is to have the conversation.